


Love and Terror

by cassiopeiasara



Series: She's Got A Way of Talkin' (Dialogue Prompts) [13]
Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: Abby centric, F/F, Prompt Fill
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-16
Updated: 2017-09-16
Packaged: 2018-12-30 10:00:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12106266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cassiopeiasara/pseuds/cassiopeiasara
Summary: She sits on a stool close to their shared whiteboard while Erin erases half an equation and almost trips over her own feet before correcting herself. Abby almost laughs but then it happens. Erin scrunches up her face before her eyes alight with an idea and Abby feels the realization hit her like a ton of bricks.The one where Abby realizes she's in love and promptly freaks out.





	Love and Terror

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: In response to a tumblr prompt for "I think I'm in love with you and I'm terrified." No beta so I apologize for any mistakes. Hope you like it. 
> 
> Disclaimer: These characters belong to Sony and I seek no profit.

She realizes it in one of those stupid kind of romcom moments Erin always swoons over. **  
**

She sits on a stool close to their shared whiteboard while Erin erases half an equation and almost trips over her own feet before correcting herself. Abby almost laughs but then it happens. Erin scrunches up her face before her eyes alight with an idea and Abby feels the realization hit her like a ton of bricks.

_I love you_  almost passes her lips but they stick in her throat and her chest tightens with a fear she hasn't known in twenty years. She's tried to tell herself it wasn't inevitable, that they'd grown and changed and just because Erin jumped into a portal, it didn't mean anything.

_Except_.

Except Erin always chooses the space next to her at movie night. Erin always brings her a snack when she’s cranky. Erin always smiles in that same slightly slanted way she did when they were kids. That smile that always felt like everything about Abby delighted her.

All of these things she's tried to ignore along with the extra skip in her heart any time Erin walks into a room lead her to this stupid moment where she can't stop thinking of ways to kiss Erin.

_Fuck_

Erin whips her head around. "What?"

Shit, she'd said it out loud. This is a problem.

Abby shrugs. "Nothing."

Erin narrows her eyebrows and considers a moment, a sure sign she doesn't accept Abby's dismissal. She opens her mouth to say something else but is interrupted by the sound of rushed steps down the stairs.

Abby’s never been so happy to see Holtz covered in wires and a devious expression that lets her know they’ll have to give Jennifer Lynch a call soon to renegotiate their insurance.

She misses the confused look Erin throws her as she follows Holtz up to her lab.

* * *

She tries to avoid Erin after that. Abby is good at hiding things like the hurt she feels any time someone called her names because of her research. She’s especially good at hiding how alone she felt before she met Holtz and how it makes her ache not to have more peers that give her credit.

The one thing she’s always been bad at hiding? The way she feels about Erin. Because these feelings, the ones she hoped she’d buried when she burnt the friendship bracelets they made in high school, resurface with a vengeance. Because now she doesn’t have to wonder what it might be like to spend all her days with Erin chasing ghosts. Now she  _knows_ and nothing has ever terrified her more.

So she skips out on their lunches, instead encouraging Erin to go out with Patty or Kevin when he can remember lunch is a break allotted in a workplace. She uses Holtz like a buffer during brainstorming sessions. (A tactic that only works half the time because Holtz has the attention span of a gnat and is too busy flirting with Patty when she’s not actively working.) She runs out of any room she hears Erin coming into and it works until movie night.

Movie Night is something she can’t avoid because they’re still a team and rapport is important. Moreover, she can’t avoid it because it’s her turn to pick the movie. They all settle in their usual spaces and Erin looks up at her like they’re sixteen again and no one is sitting with her at lunch.  It makes Abby’s heart ache and reminds her that in all this avoiding, she misses Erin. 

So she sighs and sits next to her, trying the whole movie not to think about how nice it feels to sit with their thighs pressed together, how beautiful Erin's profile looks alight with the movie. She tries not to think of that smell that’s so uniquely Erin, a mix of dry erase markers, pens, paper and whatever frilly scent she’s into at the moment. (It’s some sort of citrus blend this month).

When it’s over and Patty turns on the lights, Abby bolts out of her seat. She heads up to the roof just wanting space and to not think about how being in love with Erin Gilbert is like some weird destiny that follows her no matter how many years it’s been. More than that, she tries to quell the thoughts that tell her how much Erin is unlikely to feel the same.

She has no idea how long she’s out there before soft footsteps sound behind her. She sighs knowing exactly who they belong to because her mind doesn’t think it enough to memorize every detail about her best friend from the way she holds a pen to the chirp in her voice when she’s nervous, she apparently knows the distinct cadence of her walk too.

“Hey,” Erin says softly. Abby turns and Erin swings her arms slowly before she crosses them over her stomach.

Abby pushes up her glasses and replies, “Hey.”

Erin bites her bottom lip and Abby curses her mind when all she can think of is how adorable Erin looks. How so awkwardly, distinctly  _Erin_  the gesture is.

“Did I do something wrong?”

Abby shrugs. “What?”

“Did I do something to make you mad?”

“Why would you think that?” Abby does her best to look anywhere but in Erin’s eyes.

Erin tilts her head and drops her arms, sighing. “Because I feel like I haven’t seen you in two weeks, Abs. You keep disappearing on me and I’ve been over every conversation we’ve had trying to come up with some reason for why you’d do that.”

Abby thinks of pointing out how one time Erin left for twenty years and isn’t Abby allowed a disappearing act of her own? But it’s not fair and it’s more cruel than Abby feels.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. It’s not-” she pauses and pulls nervously at the end of her cardigan, “it’s not you, I just, I couldn’t-”

Erin knits her eyebrows and moves a little closer. “Couldn’t what?”

Abby takes a step back. “I found out something and I don’t know, I’m--” She stops and turns around hugging herself, hoping if she holds tightly enough, maybe she can keep the confession in. She stays like that for a moment before gentle hands make their way to her shoulders and give her a light squeeze.

“What is it, Abs?”

“I, uh, I think maybe, I might be a little inlovewithyou.” She mumbles the last bit but judging by the small gasp and the absence of hands on her shoulders, she’s sure Erin hears it.

Abby turns around quickly. “It doesn’t have to change anything and you can just…” Erin shifts from one foot to the other, wringing her hands and staring at Abby. 

Abby sighs.  “Just forget I said it.”

Erin startles at that. “Why?”

Abby knits her eyebrows. “Why what?”

“Why would I want to forget it?”

Abby shakes her head. “Because it’s stupid and you don’t--”

Erin moves closer and smiles, that slanted one Abby loves so much. “What if I did?”

Abby blinks a few times and clears her throat. “What?”

Erin cups Abby’s face and strokes her thumb along her cheek. “You think I jump in a portal for just anyone? Think I’d come back and glue myself to your side because I just miss having a best friend?”

“I don’t know, you could.”

Erin chuckles as she leans down and presses her lips against Abby’s. When they part, she still has Abby’s favorite smile. “I love you too.”


End file.
